All Alone
by charmingchick33
Summary: A songfic for Kerry and Carter, takes place after Sand and water, R
1. Default Chapter

Title- All Alone Author- Jarodsangel33, aka Charmingchick33 -Katelyn Email- Charmingchick33@netscape.net Category- drama Rating- PG Spoilers- Takes place after 9x02 Archive-Anyone's free to read... if they want to link to this, or add it to their pages... email me first for verification and permission. ^.^ Author's Note- This is a fic... dedicated to one of my best friends, Dillon... PS. Thanks for the nickle. Disclaimer- I don't own ER or any of the characters, they belong to NBC, and their writers and creators. Just using them for the story. I also do not own the song "Sand and Water" it belongs to Beth Neilsen Chapman and the other people who created it. FYI... I am doing it a bit differently... I am using the verse she wrote for Elton John's version for the third lines for the fourth because the fourth don't really fit the characters in this particular songfic.... Summary- Songfic using the song "Sand and Water" by Beth Neilsen Chapman ~*~*~ County General- Kerry sat at the admit desk. She'd just received a phone call from her private investigator. Once again, he thought he had a lead on Kerry's case. She decided to have him email her the information so she could get it in a more private area. She decided to go into the lounge and check it out.  
  
The Lounge- Kerry flipped on the light and headed towards the computer. She, Carter, and Elizabeth were the only ones covering the ER on this particularly dead afternoon shift so she figured she had some time. She logged into her account and opened the newest email in her box from her investigator.  
Kerry,  
The information below contains the whereabouts of someone who might be your birth-mother, this lists an address, phone number, and workplace. I hope this will help you.  
Sincerely,  
Investigator Morris  
Mrs. Glenda Clarkson  
1260 West Pine St.  
Chicago, IL.  
Workplace- owns small convenient store on corner of Duke and Jackson Streets.  
Phone Number- 900-2295  
Home number- 915-7767  
  
"Oh good, I actually know where that is," Kerry said as she printed the email and folded it. She placed it into her jacket pocket and turned off the computer. She left the Lounge just as she had found it and headed towards the desk area to find Carter.  
  
Front Desk- Kerry approached the desk and noticed the board was empty. "Must be a slow night," she thought. Randi had been doodling on the board. She had what appeared to be a sketch of a cartoon girl with a cartoon dog. She was just drawing a stick like thing coming off the girl's arm when Kerry tapped her on the shoulder.  
"Having a fun time Randi?" She asked.  
"Ohhh hi Dr. Weaver," She said trying to cover her artwork.  
"Where's Carter?" Kerry asked saying nothing of the artwork.  
"He's in curtain area 3," Randi said and turned back towards the board.  
"Oh yea and Randi, if any patients come in, I want that drawing gone." She said and limped off to find Carter.  
  
Curtain Area 3- "John?" Kerry asked. Carter and the patient both answered with a "yes?" "I meant the Dr." she said politely and asked Carter to step outside.  
"What do you need Kerry?" He asked.  
"Can you cover for me?" She asked.  
"Um I guess so, what's up?" He asked concern in his voice.  
"I just got an interesting phone call about some family information is all." Kerry said.  
"Well I can cover, go... if u want to talk, I'm here." John said.  
"Thanks John," she said as she walked away. She felt as though she could cry. Even after all those times she'd taken days from Carter, and had him do other people's work, he'd still been nice. Always, he was always a nice person.  
As Kerry walked away, Carter noticed a slip of paper fall out of her pocket, he tried to call her but she didn't hear him as she left the ER.  
  
"I guess I'll just hold on to it for a while then," He said as he unfolded it to see what it was. He quickly read over the paper and realized what Kerry was going to do. He went to the front desk and grabbed the phone.  
"Hey Susan.... Susan??" He talked into her machine.  
"What is it..." She mumbled as she picked up the phone.  
"Hey, did I wake you?"  
"Yes.... I was taking a nap... it's okay though, I have to be at work in an hour and a half." she said.  
"Susan, can you cover for me?" He asked.  
"Uh... sure, but what's in it for me?" She asked.  
"Umm I'll take your shift for you when I come back, and I'll work one other shift this week," Carter said.  
"Done... I'll be there in ten minutes." Susan said and with that hung up the phone.  
  
Kerry's Car- She decided to drive with some music on. She turned the radio on and after realizing nothing good was on, she turned it off. She reached into her pocket and realized the piece of paper had fallen out somewhere.  
"Oh shoot," She muttered as she realized she remembered all of the information. She decided since it was 1 in the afternoon that she'd try the convenient store. She decided to phone first. She pulled out her cell phone and dialed the number.  
"Hello?" a woman's voice asked.  
"Hello, Mrs. Clarkson?" She asked.  
"Yes, who's this, please don't tell me it's about Carol," the voice asked.  
"No, my name is Kerry Weaver, I have a question for you," She said.  
"Umm ok" the woman said.  
"Did you give a daughter up for adoption?"  
".... how did you get this number?" The woman asked a tone of annoyance lining her voice.  
"I hired a private investigator, I've been looking for my-" she was cut off.  
"I did give my daughter away. But I have no ties with her and I'd like to keep it that way." the woman hung up leaving Kerry alone once again. She could feel the tears starting to well up in her eyes. She pulled into the parking lot of a nearby gas station to calm herself down. She let the tears fall freely down her cheeks. She had been rejected once again.  
All alone I didn't like the feeling  
  
All alone I sat and cried  
  
All alone I had to find some meaning  
  
In the center of the pain I felt inside  
She remembered being a baby, she'd been sent to an agency in New York, then a nice family adopted her, they took her to Africa. But even then, she and her family had been in an accident.... they'd been killed while she survived suffering severe leg trauma... once again leaving her alone. She remembered then being put into another African agency, then Milungsi taking her in.... After that, she grew up and came to America with Milungsi to enroll in medical school where she met a great man named Paul. They had gotten married and had a baby girl... she was two when she was in a car accident with Paul, the two had tragically died. She had always been alone now that she'd thought of it. She began to calm down realizing that nothing's changed. She decided to check out her mother's store just for kicks.  
  
Convenient Store- Kerry pulled into the parking lot and got out of her car. She slid her crutch on her arm and entered the store. She headed to the back of the store where she fiddled with the candy in the isle. She looked to the woman at the counter. "That must be her," She thought. The woman had bright orange hair, flowing down past her elbows. She was relatively slender, and had blueish green eyes. Just then, she heard the doors open and in walked a little girl. "Mommy!!" She yelled and jumped into the woman's arms.  
"Hey sweetie, you're home early!" She said and huggled the girl.  
"Yes... look what I made today," She said happily as she showed the woman a finger painting.  
"It's beautiful." The woman said and taped it up on the wall with some other artwork.  
  
Kerry's heart sunk. She'd been given up at birth, for no apparent reason, the woman looked to be in her 50's, which means she would've been in her twenties when Kerry was born. She sighed and grabbed a package of life-savors and gum and headed to the registers.  
"Will that be it?" the woman said without looking up.  
"Yea, that's it." Kerry said fighting back her tears.  
"Mommy, she looks like you," the little girl said, "She has a stick though,"  
"Carol hunny, that isn't nice," the woman said.  
"I'm Kerry," Kerry said and looked into the woman's eyes.  
The woman didn't say anything, she just handed the bag to Kerry and told her to have a nice day.  
"Figures," Kerry thought as she leaned heavily on her crutch as she exited the store.  
  
Kerry got back into her car realizing her leg was really hurting. She noticed the woman coming towards her car.  
"How dare you," She said to Kerry.  
"What did I do, is the fact that I want to know you wrong?" Kerry said the tears beginning to form in her eyes.  
"You shouldn't be here! You aren't a part of our family, I gave you up." She yelled.  
"Yea that's right, you did.... You just don't understand what it's like growing up all alone.... you were lucky enough to have a family." Kerry said as she got into her car and stuck the keys in the ignition.  
"I figured you'd be happy to know your daughter was alive but I guess you are too preoccupied with your own life that u could care less about mine." Kerry said.  
"That's not true but while we're on the subject why are you using that crutch?" the woman asked.  
"If it's any of your business I was in a terrible car accident with my adoptive parents... they were killed and I lived." Kerry retorted. "If that's all you needed to know about my 32 years of life, goodbye mom..." Kerry said the tears pouring down her cheeks as she drove away. She didn't notice Carter's jeep sitting in the parking lot observing the whole argument.  
  
Kerry decided to go home.... She figured Sandy and her were over considering their recent argument... so she decided to just relax.  
  
Kerry sighed. "Just great. I can be home alone now too...." She muttered as she slammed her car door and headed upstairs to her apartment. She threw her key on the counter when she got inside. She decided to go sit down and watch some tv. She took a seat on the couch and turned on one of the soaps. She began to think about the past days events and began to cry. She laid on her side and cried into the pillow. She began to drift off into sleep.  
All alone I came into this world  
  
All alone I will someday die  
  
Solid stone is just sand and water, baby  
  
Sand and water, and a million years gone by Carter's Car- Carter decided to check on Kerry before interfering with her family. He slowly drove over to her apartment humming to the tune of the song playing in his car. 


	2. All Alone Part II

Title- All Alone Part II  
  
Author- Jarodsangel33, aka Charmingchick33 -Katelyn  
  
Email- Charmingchick33@netscape.net  
  
Category- drama  
  
Rating- PG  
  
Spoilers- Takes place after 9x02   
  
Archive-Anyone's free to read... if they want to link to this, or add it to their pages... email me first for verification and permission. ^.^  
  
Author's Note- This is a fic... dedicated to one of my best friends, Dillon... PS. Thanks for the nickle.  
  
Disclaimer- I don't own ER or any of the characters, they belong to NBC, and their writers and creators. Just using them for the story. I also do not own the song "Sand and Water" it belongs to Beth Neilsen Chapman and the other people who created it. FYI... I am doing it a bit differently... I am using the verse she wrote for Elton John's version for the third lines for the fourth because the fourth don't really fit the characters in this particular songfic....   
  
Summary- Songfic using the song "Sand and Water" by Beth Neilsen Chapman   
  
~*~*~   
  
Kerry's apartment- Carter ran up the stairs heading towards Kerry's place.  
  
"Kerry?" he asked as he knocked on her door. "Kerry?" He asked again. Remembering the copy of Kerry's key he had from his time living at her house, he inserted it into the lock and opened the door. Kerry was on the couch sleeping. Carter sighed relief hitting him.  
  
  
  
He stood there watching her sleep. After a few minutes passed, he decided to take her to her room. He opened up her bedroom door and rolled down her bed.   
  
He walked back and picked her up. She flinched a bit at his touch but stayed asleep. He gently placed her on her bed and tucked her in. He decided to watch some tv until she woke up.   
  
~*2 hours later*~  
  
Carter decided to attempt to make dinner for Kerry. Remembering the fact that she was a light and somewhat picky eater, he decided for something he was positive she liked. Spaghetti and Salad.  
  
After searching Kerry's kitchen for the right equipment, he started to cook. First he started the sauce remembering Kerry's instructions about the sauce. He separated the peppers to create the separate colors for the sauce and began to cook. When he had the sauce situated, he got started with the salad. He searched Kerry's fridge for some cucumbers, tomatoes, and lettuce. He began to seed what Kerry had called the "Persian Cucs" and laughed at his pervious time attempting to seed them.... He soon finished preparing the salad making no mistakes....   
  
He decided to start the pasta. He filled a pot with water and watched it until it boiled and he threw in the pasta. He began to hum the words to one of his deep jazz songs as he cooked.  
  
~*Kerry's Room*~  
  
Kerry awoke to the smell of food. At first she was confused, initially she thought she'd been kidnaped until she noticed she was in her bedroom.... in her bed. She realized she didn't' have her crutch and muttered a curse. She decided to try and walk without it, managing to swing her legs over the edge of the bed.  
  
Unfortunately when she went to get up, pain shot through her leg and her ankles buckled and she fell to the floor. Muttering a curse, she attempted to get up realizing she was stuck on the floor in the un-normal position she'd fallen into. She hoped whoever was outside had heard the loud thump.  
  
~*Outside Kerry's Room*~  
  
John who'd been now humming a deep orchestra piece had gotten to the drum part and was so pre-occupied in his mental replay of the song, he hadn't heard Kerry fall. A few mintues later, there was a knock at the door. An older man answered and Carter looked at him a bit puzzled.  
  
"Can I help you?" Carter asked.  
  
"I heard a loud thump... are you okay?" The man asked.  
  
"Yea... I think Ms. Weaver is asleep," Carter said.  
  
"I heard a thump.... I think you should check on her, you know.... she's handicapped" the man whispered awkwardly at the word handicapped.  
  
"I wouldn't say that..." John explained trying to stick up for his fellow doctor.  
  
"Well just check," the man said and turned to leave.  
  
"Thank you sir," Carter said as he left.   
  
~*Kerry's Room*~  
  
Carter came up and opened the door expecting to see Kerry asleep in her bed, he nearly jumped on the floor when he saw her lying there. "Oh my God Kerry, let me help you," He said and pulled her up.  
  
"Hi John...." She said.  
  
"Umm Hi," he said as he wrapped his arm around her waist for support as she walked to the living room for her crutch.  
  
"Sleep well?" He asked.  
  
"... as well as a nightmarish sleep can make you sleep I guess..." She mumbled as she sipped her left over coffee from the afternoon.... she nearly choked when the cold liquid hit her mouth.  
  
"Well sit tight, I've got a surprise for you," Carter said and dashed back to the kitchen.   
  
~*10 minutes later in the kitchen*~  
  
John had dished up the salad and was putting it on the table. He had the noodles in the pot so they would stay warm. He came back into the family room and helped Kerry to the table. He seated her and she rested her crutch on the floor. Carter came in with 2 small salads and wine. He dimmed the lights and put the food on the table. "Surprise," he said and filled her wine flute with champagne. 


End file.
